Now that we’ve finished our first renga, it seemed like it would be good idea to sit back and figure out what we’re doing well and what parts need some work.
We had linkage of a verse to the one before it down pretty well. Some of the ones I liked best were when a verse echoed a key word from the verse before but put it in a different context. Even when none of the words repeated, I liked the echo of concepts and moods.
Our most obvious flubs had to do with lack of distance between a verse and the one two verses before it. The best example I can come up with is that a renga is like a path. You start and there’s a smooth flow from beginning to end, but you keep moving and you never backtrack. (Though just the muddy the waters, the end might just echo the beginning. Take a look at the first and last verses of this renga again.) Does that make sense to everyone? Is it helpful?
I’d like to experiment with different lengths, but do you think in general we should try for longer or shorter renga? Any other thoughts on improving our renga technique?
5 responses so far ↓
1
Seth Ben-Ezra
// Oct 12, 2006 at 8:31 am
>Though just the muddy the waters, the end might just echo the beginning.
Of course, that was totally unintended by me.
2
Seth Ben-Ezra
// Oct 12, 2006 at 12:08 pm
What about the seasonal rotation? Are you wanting to bring that in?
And I do think that this was a good length. The other option is to shorten it a bit so that we can do more of them. I wouldn’t go longer at this point.
3
Raquel
// Oct 13, 2006 at 11:42 am
I think we should at least experiment with the seasonal rotation. I found a simple explanation here. Is there anything else/different we need to know?
Right now I’m thinking we should try a twelve verse renga next. Anything else? Anyone?
4
Adiel
// Oct 14, 2006 at 10:58 am
My only suggestion is to keep in mind that there are those of us who are learning about Renga for the first time and are therefore still trying to get the feel for it. Also, try to remember that since we are not physically present in Peoria and haven’t had interesting conversations all together about the different philosophies of Renga we may not have the same exact “feel” that you Peorians do.
For example, I think you should have included Barb’s ending instead of using Seth’s because Barb had not previously contributed anything. Sure, the ending may not have been what you would have chosen, but it would have been more of a group effort.
I’m excited to try a new one now that we all have a better idea of what we’re doing. I think our Renga, while a little disjointed at times, has a unique beauty about it.
This blog was a good idea. Thanks for organizing it, Raquel!
5
Raquel
// Oct 17, 2006 at 1:31 pm
Adiel,
 We’ve actually had very few renga discussions beyond what’s gone on online, but it probably helps that I learned most of my general haiku theory from Seth in the first place. I think you do make a good point, and I will keep it in mind.
 I’m pretty excited that we finished a renga–there were times that I wasn’t sure we were going to make it all the way through. Plus, I started only knowing of two participants (one being me) and we now have six (plus a few people I could still nag into it). I’m starting to think this is working!
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